An Unholy ED-lliance

Prologue

The cold and dark vacuum of space is home to many weird beings. Some friendly, some shy, but the most horrible of all are the Deamons. These beings are made of the raw material of the Warp, and they know only one thing: War!

Each deamon serves a god. There are about a hundred of these gods, but the four most powerful, which are brothers, are:
Khorne (who the Eldar call Khaine), God of Battles and Bloodshed;
Tzeentch, God of Wisdom and Magic;
Nurgle, God of Decay and Pestilence;
and Slaanesh, God of Pleasures and Jokes.

The followers of these gods rather fight each other than some other race. But sometimes, the followers of these gods can join together in a unholy alliance.............

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why in the name of Slaanesh can´t you just forget about Terra, Kharn?" Githu Poisonbite asked as Kharn raged once more about his loss against the Omega squadron Outlaws.
Kharn looked up at Githu. His eyes blazed with a furios hatred.
"Do you want to know why I can´t forget?" Kharn said and walked up to Githu. He took a firm grip on Githu´s tongue as it went out again. After all, Githu is a snake Deamon.
"The reason why, is that I once were a Space Outlaw."
"Let go of my dongue." Githu said haplessly as Kharn pulled some more in his tongue.
"And another thing! I have a feeling that my most hated enemy is still alive!!"
Kharn let go of Githu´s tongue, which snapped back into Githu´s mouth with a result of Githu almost swallowing it.
"And," Githu said as he got his tongue in proper order. "Who may that be?"
Kharn walked over to one of the many many windows in the Chamber of Khorne. He put his massive hands on the window-frame.
"His name is Yarrick. Commissar Rolf Yarrick."

Rolf woke up with a start. He was in cold sweat. What he´d just dreamed, he´d never dreamt before.
"What a nightmare." he thought to himself. "What did that deamon mean with that we were going to meet again? I´ve never seen him before."
Rolf looked at the clock beside his bed. It was 5.00 a.m in the morning.
"I can just as well get up. The cows need to get milked."
As Rolf got up, he felt a bit weird, like something was wrong. By some instinct, he looked at his right hand. He looked at it fascinated for a while. Then he snapped back to reality.
He got dressed and went out to his animals.

Two hours later, Rolf was busy feeding the animals, when Double D showed up with the morning paper.
"Good morning Rolf." Double D said and stopped by Rolf´s fence. He leaned onto it and watched Rolf as he feeded his goats. He was glad that the adventures they had as Space Outlaws were over.
Rolf looked up and walked over to Double D. Victor followed Rolf up to the fence.
"So, you got my morning paper, yes?" Rolf asked.
"Of course." was Double D´s simple answer as he handed Rolf his paper.
"Here." Rolf said and handed Double D a quarter. "You work hard and deserve it."
"Wow, thanks Rolf." Double D said and walked away.
"May the Emperor watch over you!" Rolf shouted after Double D.
Double D stopped dead. What had Rolf shouted?
"What did you say?" Double D said as he ran back to Rolf.
Rolf looked confunded.
"I don´t really know..." was all he got out. Victor looked worriedly on his master (however a goat does that).
When Rolf looked up, Double D was gone.
"This day is turning out to be very weird, Victor." he said quietly. Victor just bleated in reply.

When Double D had completed his paper-round, he went home. Eddy and Ed were waiting outside, as usual. Double D didn´t feel happy at all with seeing them. Instead, he felt uncomfortable when he thought of what Rolf had said.
"Hey, Double D. Why the long face?" Eddy asked as Double D opened the door and went in.
Eddy and Ed followed, remembering to take off their shoes this time.
The two followed Double D, who hung his paper-bag on the hook in his room and then went down to the cellar. When Double D turned on the lights, it revealed the armour of the Space Outlaws that they had worn. All the suits had been repaired; Eddy´s Lightning Claws, Ed´s Jump Pack and Double D´s Plasma Gun had gotten a "face lift".
"Holy smokes." Eddy said quietly.
"Way cool." Ed said as he walked over to his suit of Power armour.
"How the heck were you able to repair them?" Eddy asked as he took a closer look on his Lightning Claws. They were in just as good shape as when he´d seen them the first time, if not better.
"McKenzie made a visit with some extra armour-balls. He can see the future, but is forbidden to speak about it." Double D said and stopped Ed from activating one of the Melta Bombs.
Eddy walked over to the table were Ed´s and Double D´s weapons were. There, he noticed something.
"Hey! Ain´t this Yarrick´s spirit-ball?" he said and picked up a red crystal-ball.
"Yes, it is. Put it down." Double D´s snapping answer came.
"Why?" Eddy said and put it down cautiously.
"It leaks." Double D said and gave Eddy a look.
"Whaddya mean "leaks"?"
"Rolf said to me this morning that the Emperor is watching over me."
"You mean like, he´s getting Yarrick´s memories?"
"Yeah, exactly."
"What can we do?" Ed asked from his battle suit.
"Nothing." Double D said and looked up from the table. "Chaos has come to town."
The other two looked at Double D with worried faces.

Rolf was petting Victor when Kevin showed up with his bike and a basketball,at around 12.00 a.m.
"Hey Rolf!" Kevin shouted. "Time to break your old record score!"
Kevin threw the ball to Rolf, who catched it easily with one hand. Rolf walked up to Kevin.
"What´s the matter Rolf?" Kevin asked. "You look down."
"There´s nothing wrong with me. I feel fine, it´s just that...I had this strange dream."
"It was just a dream, it wasn´t for real, right?"
"Yes, but it felt so real."
"Forget about the dream. Let´s see you beat your old record."
Rolf shone up and jumped over his fence. He was in a better mood now.
"Thanks Kevin. You know how to cheer a person up."
"Don´t mention it." Kevin answered and the two walked away to the playground.

"What is it, Eddy?" Double D asked as he put Yarrick´s spirit-ball in his pocket.
"I was just wondering, how the heck could I move, let alone run in my armour?"
Double D walked up to Eddy, and put a hand behind the Terminator suit, on the backpack to be more exact.
"Let me show you." Double D said and a click-sound was heard. It was closely followed by the well-known sound of a plasma-reactor. I.e a high-pitched whining sound.
Slowly the Terminator suit began straighten up, from a slumped standing position to a position near to attention.
"Cool." Eddy said. "Does your armour have the same motor?"
"No, Ed´s and mine battle suits are lighter than yours. We don´t need the many gears and servos that a Terminator suit has."
"Double D, what are these?" Ed asked and held up two small flasks, about two inches high.
"Ed, be careful, those are plasma-flasks."
"Why should I be careful?" Ed said and put them down.
"They´re highly volatile." Double D said and put the plasma-flasks in a box at put them underneath the table.
"There." Double D said as he looked up. "I belive we´re ready to give Rolf all "his" memory."
"Are you sure about this?" Eddy asked as he dragged Ed with him.
"Yes, the spirit ball is leaking and there is nothing we can do about it. He´ll get all the memories in time anyhow."
Double D walked out of the room and switched of the lights. Ed and Eddy hurried out. They didn´t want to be left alone with the suits. There was something with them that spooked them.

"Put this in the basket, and you´ve beaten your old record." Kevin said as he threw the basket-ball to Rolf.
"That´s gonna be easy." Rolf replied as he catched the ball and took aim.
But just as he took aim, something seemed to go up to him. He gave Kevin a dark look.
"Whaddya wating for?" Kevin asked, unaware of what had happened to Rolf.
The shot came, but instead of going towards the basket, it landed in Kevin´s head.
"Ow!! What the heck do you think you´re doing!?" Kevin shouted as he rubbed his head.
"I have no idea of what happened to me, Kevin."
"Well, don´t let it happen again!"
The Eds had watch all this happen, and Eddy had hard time to stop himself to burst out in a horselaugh. Double D was on the other hand worried. Apparently, Rolf had recieved a piece of Yarricks hatred against Kharn, or in this case Kevlinn.
"This is not good." he said quietly.
"You´re right, it wasn´t good, it was great!" Eddy responded after calming down.
"Eddy, I mean that if Rolf is left alone with Kevin long enough, he might kill him."
"I don´t care."
"And I give up." Double D sighed. "We gotta get Rolf home to me, without Kevin suspecting anything. Got any ideas?"
"I´m stumped." Ed´s answer came.
"As usual." Eddy´s caustic reply came. "I think I know. What if you use your psionical powers to make the ball bounce on the pole to the basket, and make it fly into this bush?"
"It´s possible."
"I`ve seen you do it in school, when we have P.E and you´re watching. You get this weird blue, luminous light around you."
"So that´s why we´ve won so many games lately." Ed said as he realized why they´d won.
"You´re a genious Ed, a genious." Eddy said sarcastically.
Double D looked out the bush and saw that Rolf was about to throw the ball again.
"Okay, here goes." he said and closed his eyes and began concentrating on the ball.

*******************

"You can´t send a Deamon into the Immaterium against his will!!" Githu screamed as Kharn had lifted him up and was about throwing him into a Warp-passage.
"For crying out loud, Kharn. Throw him in!" Amon Chakai roared as he kept the Warp-passage open. "I can´t keep it open any longer!"
"Take care off the Space Outlaws, but leave Yarrick to me, Githu!" Kharn said as he heaved Githu into the open passage. When Githu had disappeared into the Warp, the passage closed and Amon Chakai fell to the floor. Exacusted.
"All well, pal?" Kharn asked as he helped Amon up.
"I´m fine, but why did you want to send Githu Poisonbite to get the Outlaws? I mean, he´s got no real experience as a Deamon."
"I sent him first because of the simple reason that I hate him. He won´t stand a chance against the Space Outlaws and Yarrick."
"Oh, yeah. Your patron god, Khorne, hates Slaanesh, Githu´s patron, right? Almost forgot."
"Yeah, you almost did but Githu did it competly. Haha."
"To me it seems odd though, that you choose Githu and not somebody else, like Gutspew Nurgle."
"That stink-bomb?" Kharn said as they walked around in the Tower of Despair. "Get real."
"I heard that." a low croaking voice could be heard. "I can hear ten times as good as you, Kharn Fleshtearer."
Kharn and Amon turned round and looked at the short (for Deamons) figure almost shrouded in flies.
Amon got a weird look on his face and his feathers changed to a dull, green colour.
Kharn noticed this and went over to Gutspew.
"Can we talk some other place? Amon has got....a keen sense of smell."
"I get the hike, Kharn." Gutspew answered and the two walked away from there.
When Kharn and Gutspew was gone, Amon exhaled.
"Phew! I´ll never learn to stand the Nurglitchian followers."
He ragained his old dark purple colour and walked out of the chamber.

"Rolf, you´re completly loosing concentration!" Kevin shouted as the basket-ball flew into a bush.
"I promise, I aimed for the basket."
"Just go get the ball in the bush."
"Okay, okay." Rolf said and walked towards the bush in which the basket-ball had landed. When he came out on the other side, he saw Double D standing before him, holding in something.
"Ed-boy Double D, what are you doing here?"
"Nothing, really." Double D answered and opened his clutched hands, revealing the spirit-ball. The spirit-ball began glowing and before Rolf knew what had happened, a red beam hit him in his head. He got a shocked expression as all the "memories" returned.
Eddy and Ed stood behind Double D. Ed looked terrified on Rolf and Eddy asked:
"That hurts a lot, doesn´t it Double D?"
"Yeah, he´s getting about 250 years of memory."
"Did Yarrick get that old?"
"McKenzie told me he was a half-breed. Half Space Marine, half human."
Suddenly, the spirit-ball stopped glowing, and a split second later, it dissipated into dust. Double D, Ed and Eddy looked at the dust, that was spread by the wind as a light breeze came.
"I belive it thought it had found it´s real owner." Rolf said as he also watched the dust disappear with the winds.
The Eds quickly turned round and looked at Rolf. He was clad in Yarrick´s uniform again. Double D were the first of the Eds to get to grips with reality.
"Who are you?" he asked, to test if Rolf awas still Rolf, and not Commissar Yarrick.
"I´m Rolf of course and I know that I´m charing memories of a great hero."
"Good, you know the difference between you and Yarrick. Now, remove the uniform and follow us home to me. I have to tell you all something very important."

Githu landed with a thump on the ground in the woods outside the cul-de-sac. He got up and dusted of the dirt from his tail and loin-cloth.
"When I get back, Kharn, you´ll be so damn sorry for this!" he mumbled to himself as he crawled away. He looked out from a bush and right down to the cul-de-sac.
From there, he saw Ed,Edd, Eddy and Rolf walk to Double D´s house.
"Now, what a great time to have the keen eyesight of a cat-deamon." he hissed. After that, he coiled and decided to wait. He could very well hypnotise every kid in the cul-de-sac, but he decided to be sneaky and wait for the evening, when he had the upper hand with his superior night vision.
"The poor devils wont even know what bit them, heheh." Githu said as he closed his eyes for a quick rest.

"So, what is so very important, Double D?" Eddy asked as they got down into cellar.
"You won´t belive me if I told you, but I´ll do it anyhow. Kharn is going to come back." Double D answered and looked on the three before him.
"Is that why Yarrick´s spirit-ball leaked?" Ed asked.
"Yes, and he´s got allies, as usual. He does nothing alone."
"Is it Dark Eldar or Hive Fleet warriors? If so, we can take ´em on." Eddy said and looked confident.
"Nope, these are Deamons, and that´s as much as I can tell you off the future."
"Deamons are no problem. I´ve, I mean, Yarrick, has fought them before." Rolf said.
"What are we going to? Wait here till the first one appears? No way." Eddy added.
"Precisely Eddy. We´re going to get into the suits and wait for night-fall. As I can also see the future, less than McKenzie but anyhow, I know the first Deamon will attack after night-fall."
Ed looked at the clock on the wall and said:
"But it´s more than ten hours to night-fall!"
"That´s my point. It takes about three hours to get into the suits. It´s harder to get into them then out of them. Rolf, you go back to Kevin and apologize for that with the ball, and we´ll prepare ourselves for battle."
"Okay." Rolf said and left, leaving the coat and armament of Yarrick on the table. Eddy went over to his Terminator suit and turned his head to Double D and said:
"When I get into this suit, I´m going to be the leader, not you."
"Whatever you want Eddy." was Double D´s answer.
"What are we going to do when we´ve gotten into them?" Eddy asked. "We can´t just walk around out in the cul-de-sac, you know that."
"We´ll just have to wait." Double D´s reply came.
"For seven hours!?" Eddy cried out. "I´ll die of boredom!"
"As Yarrick said once: Why are you in such a hurry to die?"
"I won´t die, and the same goes for you, Ed and Rolf. The only ones that are going to die are the Deamons."
"Your wish is my command, Captain." Double D said and saluted Eddy.
"At ease, soldier. Now, can you help me into this suit?"
"Double D, how are we going to get out?" Ed asked as he seemed to realize the door wasn´t wide enough for him and Eddy.
"Uh, I haven´t really thought of that..." Double D´s voice travelled off as it went up to him that he hadn´t thought of it at all.

(Oookay, we make a jump ten hours into the future...)

Githu opened his eyes. He looked down into the cul-de-sac, "switching" vision to a sort of heat-vision. Down there, he saw the siluette of Rolf running from his house to Double D´s.
"Hsss, feel taken in Kharn, I´ll take Yarrick for myself." Githu hissed as he crawled away, down into the cul-de-sac.
Githu´s skin adapted a colour similar to the greys and blues of the night. He was after all a hunter. A hunter who killed for joy, not because of the need to eat.

"Hello Ed-boys." Rolf said as he came down to the cellar. "Sorry it took such time, but I had to make sure all the doors were locked, just in case."
"No need to worry Rolf. We still have to figure out how to get out of here." Double D replied.
Rolf went over to the table and began putting on Yarrick´s greatcoat.Doing so, he accidentally bumped the cap so it fell to the floor. When he picked it up, he noticed something lying underneath the table. He pulled it out, and it reavealed itself to be a box containing three helmets.
"Double D, I belive these are yours." he said and put on the cap.
"Oh, thanks Rolf. I almost forgot them. McKenzie showed me how to get them out of the armour-balls."
Ed walked up to the box and picked up one of the helmets. It´s facemask was almost formed like a beak, i.e it was a bit pointy. He lifted it up before him and said:
"To be or not to be, that´s the question. Is this one mine?"
"Yes, Ed. And the one with the targeter-eye is Eddy´s. I belive they might come in handy."
"Speaking of that, where is Eddy?" Rolf said as he swung the belt with the lasgun and the sword on his back.
Just then, Eddy came back from where he´d been.
"I know how we´re going to get out now."
"How?" Double D asked.
"You don´t need to be a genious to know this is a storm-cellar. All I did was to find the entrance from outside."
"But it´s locked from the outside." Double D said worriedly.
"Not any more." Eddy said and held up a pretty twisted piece of metal. "Lightning Claws come mighty in handy sometimes."
"Here Eddy." Double D said and threw Eddy his helmet. "Put it in your magnetic belt."
"Okay boys, let´s move out!" Eddy said and made a gesture against the doors he´d "unlocked".

When the four warriors came out, they realized how dark it was. And to make things worse, Double D had told Eddy and Ed about the Deamons that can see in the dark.
"I can´t see a crap." Eddy said as he looked around.
"Me neither." came the reply from Rolf.
Double D closed his eyes and concentrated. As Deamons were made of raw psionic energy, he could be able to "see" it if he concentrated. Eddy, on the other hand, had put on his helmet. He was hoping that it included some sort of night-vision. It didn´t, but instead of night-vision, it had some sort of infra-red heat-vision.
"Cool." he said, the voice sounding a bit metallic because of the helmet. "This is better than your goggels we used in the hide-n-seek game Double D."
Double D didn´t answer, he had collapsed into a heap on the ground.
"Double D!?" Eddy shouted.
Double D looked up on Eddy with a tired look and pointed towards a place in his backyard.
Before their eyes, the shape of Githu Poisonbite revealed itself as he uncloaked. The neon colors on his tail and skin glowing almost luminously, the tongue in his mouth going in and out as he "sniffed" the air. His eyes, dark purple as they was, revealed him to be a sneaky and sly person, his four arms all being lethal weapons on their own, and one hand welded a giant single edged blade of adamantine.
"Let me present myself." he said. "I am Githu Poisonbite, Deamon Lord of Slaanesh; God of Pleasures and Jokes."
As he ended that sentence, he coiled together and jumped on the Outlaws and the Commissar.